How to Make Change Simple
Welcome to part 2 of our guide to becoming a better you. Now that you’re motivated to become better, you may be experiencing doubts about if you can actually change.
Over the years, it's been constantly debated and researched if personality changes are possible or not. Several answers have been sought for; if people can change truly and if personality is developed or inherited. Nevertheless, several pieces of evidence have justified that across our lifetimes, it's possible for us to modify parts of our personality. For us to understand this, we must understand what the word "personality" means. So, what is personality?
All humans have their respective character which is often formed by a mix of qualities or characteristics. Now, these sets of qualities or characteristics are what's referred to as personality. The thing is, we all have some traits that have been with us throughout our lives and these traits do get to form our personalities. For instance, you may not like routine or anything that's too predictable but adore seeking something new if you've always loved challenging yourself and being adventurous and optimistic when you are little.
You might as well be sensitive, challenging, friendly, cautious, disciplined, spontaneous, thoughtful, encouraging, outgoing, positive, organized, even-keeled, hands-on, or logical if you've always had any of these traits. In fact, there are some attributes that have been ingrained in us. But the truth of the matter is, that life offers us endless opportunities to grow and evolve, work on our actions, modify our behavior and personality, and change and build ourselves for the best — we enjoy all of these as we become older and wiser with experience.
So, to answer your question; is it possible to change? The response is yes. Yes, you can change. Yes, you can do better. Yes, you can build a new, better you.
Here’s how to make change simple:
You have to know yourself before you can even attempt to change yourself. It's very crucial. Knowing yourself comes with loads of benefits and, Pythagora, Socrates, Aristotle, and a host of other ancient philosophers did emphasize how relevant this is. So, how can you get to know yourself? A little soul searching and self-reflecting can help you to become more acquainted with who you are. You can as well take an assessment to get to know your personality better and have more knowledge about yourself.
Be True to Yourself
We live in a world where people love to bask in deception and take pleasure in being fake about everything and who they are. “To thine own self be true.” This is one of the famous quotes of Shakespeare that calls for the acceptance of our uniqueness. You may have a model that's motivating you, you may be taking courses to impact your behavior, and you may be reading books to be knowledgeable about your actions but, are you true to yourself? Why do you want to change? Is it to meet up with people's expectations or to fit in? Do you just want to be better than you used to be? Reflect on that but have it registered in your mind that you're uniquely you and living a life true to yourself is a courageous act.
Set Yourself Up for Success
There are a couple of things you must keep in your mind when you're trying to change, and here are some of them:
Understand Your “Why”
Your desire to make a change shouldn't come from the outside in but from the inside out. Thus, endeavor to be conscious of why you must change. If you don't have a substantial and compelling reason, you may not be able to make a lasting change. The changes you try to make won't stick if you don't find your "why" to be essential or you're just doing it because some people feel it's best you should. You must believe in the benefits of change, just as you know why you must change.
What exactly is it that you're planning to change? Be clear and specific about it. Do you desire to be more disciplined, social, less selfish, more thoughtful, or kinder? Be specific. Know the areas you want to improve on and don't just flow with "whichever way" or "whatever comes".
Once you've understood your why and you're now aligned with "what" you want to work on, the next step is to focus on "how" you intend to change. It takes time and dedicated effort to effect real change. Thinking solves nothing and neither does it foster a change in your personality. To make a change, you must build positive and helpful habits.
Yes, invest. This time, not for a business purpose but for yourself because an investment in yourself is the best investment you can ever make. What trait do you desire to improve, change, or grow? Identify that first and then proceed with your plan. You can invest in skill development, training, or education. You can read on any topic, find books to read, or even take advantage of the many resources, online courses, and podcasts available. You can join us in Better You In 52 to simplify the process. Take time to listen to other people's stories if you want to be more open-minded or you're curious. If you want to develop your emotional intelligence (EQ), take a course on that. Likewise, you can read a book or take a course on time management if you desire to become more organized or more efficient.
Build Your Self-Esteem and Confidence
Take action to beef up your self-esteem and confidence. When you're idle, you'll become vulnerable to thinking negatively but when you're active, you'll feel more motivated and more confident, which will help you eliminate fear and self-doubt.
Understand Your Values and Beliefs
Some people don't even know what their values and beliefs are and, little do they know that changing their personality warrants that they understand their values and beliefs. How you show up in the world, how you interact, and the decisions you make can be massively influenced by your values. This is simply because your values are the principles guiding you. When it comes to values, there are no wrong or right ones and neither are they bad or good ones. It's all about what you find to be best suitable for you — your values. And, given how influencing these values are, you must become aware of them. You can use Values Cards, book a session, journal, or explore any other option to discover your values.
Beliefs, on the other hand, are your dispositions towards some things or your attitude towards a notion. Change your beliefs and you’ll change your life.